lets start again

Well I said I would make this blog about my fight against the negativity that I constantly have in my head but so far all I have done is rant on and on about what makes my life so shit. I had my first session with a 'counsellor' yesterday and it did not go how I thought it would. She tried to give me advice on how to sleep and the best way of losing weight and keeping it off and she said that I would be fine once I got a job. So what a waste of time that was... Did she even listen to me? I told her I had lost about 4 stone and then she went on about weight loss even though she said I looked fine. If people telling me I looked fine was enough to 'fix' me then I wouldn't have been there....

So I guess I am in this alone. I don't think anyone but myself can help me out in this life. I have made so many mistakes in the past (see previous blogs) and I'm sure to make loads more in the future but thats life right? I've moved back home and I'm here now whether I like it or not and I HAVE to make the most of it.

So here's what I'm going to do.
Every morning when I wake up I am going to smile. :D
Everyday I am going to get a hug from someone, even if its the dog.
Everyday I am going to laugh out loud.
Everyday I am going to get some exercise even if it is just walking the dog.
And most of all I am going to stop over analysing everything in life.

I am 21. Its meant to be an awesome age. I'll be 22 this month and my 22nd year is going to be amazing. I'm going to do what I want to do and be who I want to be and if that means working in shops and cafes for a year so be it. I'm going to stop trying to impress people and try and fit in with people. I'm going to stop comparing myself to other people. I have everything that I need: my family. And they have me, and yeh, they are lucky to have me. :) Me and all my crap that comes along with me.